I’m happy to share a cool #mentalwellness story quick if you’re not busy. I have #PTSD from a #policebrutality in #arlington back in 2014. I suffer from some memory loss-more accurately I be (re)remembering things (images, locations, skills!).
Today I caught a breeze that reminds me of #ammanjordan🇯🇴 and my time studying Arabic.
Since my injury conjuring a sentence that wasn’t some dialect of English has left me with migraines and nausea. Not always intense but impactful.
I spent 4 years, 100s of hours, and many a full scalp to learn this language in hopes of sharing in community. Like most the things I don’t know I don’t know anymore it’s always a surprise the first time I’m found wanting.
Montreal in 2018 was when it first happened. Lunging for language, and whiffing. Trapped in a cab as the most illiterate. The carsickness lingered well into the day.
The irony Is lost on those who haven’t tried traversing شارع to شارع in silence in Jordan. I’ve silenced that part of me to avoid the insult and injury. A few canned lines from 101 are still drilled into my brain, but there’s been a gap, tutoring doesn’t mend trauma.
Back to the breeze right? Back to Amman where the sun could be forced to #socialdistance – for a price – tea, hookah. Where a breeze may be the nudge that turns a day into a time.
This breeze today nudged something in my brain and Reminded me of what I’ve always known. How do I decide what communities I belong to? What else have I always known⁉️
…how do we decide where we belong?Toni Morrison
Just a little bit of basic writing but with no pain! Ok anyway i gotta run!